What's wrong with my mother and my whole family?

It sounds like your mother has a lot of issues. The first thing you need to realize is that it's not about you. It's not your fault. This is a poisonous environment for you and you need to get out of it. You're legally an adult so I would move out if I were you. Then I would stay away from her for the rest of my life, if I were you. It's not fair for her to dump her issues on you. She needs proffessional help.