Is he being too controlling?

He swears his protective ways will get better when you're married...?? There is no way they will get anything but worse. Especially if you go from having a job to being a housewife. It sounds like he's trying to get you into as tight a vicelock as possible. This is how SERIOUSLY abusive relationships begin. He's showing all the telltale signs. He's verbally abusive and hateful to you, because he loves you? I hope you realize how WRONG that sounds! No one who truly loves you would treat you like that. Don't marry this dude.