Is this clear-seen and felt?

Hi contact! I respect this as a genuine token of your sentimentalism plus of your present negative level of desperation and pain. Either I am very tired as of being up for a whole long day or I cannot clearly perceive of your main idea because of a lack of explanation. What is the cause of all this grief? You may portray it abstractly if it is too personal. I understand it is something that hurts, but maybe you wish to hide it from the others, purposely maybe. But in any case it's either you want to express pain or to mirror your pain on a good poem.. 1st advise: Less words, more condensed meaning. 2. Try to separate stanzas, so it will be more evident any change in thinking. 3. Symmetry. Be proportional in meanings and scenes. Good, leveled appearance accounts more than you think. 4. Not over and over again on the same topic without finding a peak or a way out of verbal labyrinths. (More clear and brief descriptions). In any case, it is a good start between the two of us, as poem-partners, welcome on this.